You're sitting in the window frame again, looking at the night sky. You should be in bed by now, but as usual you're not. You love the night. The smells, the cool air sending small shivers through you. You often asked me to hold you, keep your warm as we both sat there, right where you're sitting now. It was at times like this, I got to know the real you. I lowered my guards and let you see the real me. Even after what you learned and discovered, you still loved me. You taught me to believe in forever, but as I told you, forever was too good to be true.

You're smiling. That smile. I love your smile. You're looking at something. What are you looking at, my love? Oh I see... the star.

Our star.

The star we wished upon every night. I'll bet you still wish on it, like I do. Actually I've hung my wish on every star up there, but it hasn't done me any good. I can only dream of being with you again. Even though I'm right here, only a few inches from you, you're still so far away. A whole dimension between us.

No keep smiling... no please don't cry... please don't. I can't stand to see you cry. I can't stand not being able to wipe your tears away, comfort you, hold you in my arms and make it all better. You've shed too many tears in your life.

That's it, my love. Smile again, think about the happy times we had. You're wiping your nose on my tee shirt. Why you wear it is beyond me. It's way too big for you, but you don't seem to care. Maybe it's what your heart needs. You haven't washed it since I left. Not once. Guess my scent is on it. You bury your head in it and inhale deeply.

Oh God I miss you.

I was with you today, you know? When you slowly walked down the street, smiling at the kids running past you. You looked so happy.

Some times I swear you can hear me when I speak your name, like I did today. You turned around and looked, your hair swayed in the wind. Hope filling your eyes. But sadly you turned away. You shook your head and chuckled, feeling stupid for even thinking that you heard me. I was walking right beside you, my hand on your shoulder, my lips whispering your name in your ear.

I wish I could feel you, touch your soft skin. Feel your hair when I run my fingers through it. Feel your warmth. I'm so lost without you.

I'm empty and cold.

I laughed faintly as you picked up an apple and smelt it, like I had taught you. You smiled and looked at it, remembering, I'm sure. You placed it in your basket and a silent tear ran down your cheek. You wiped it away and took a deep breath.

I gasped and my heart almost broke as you looked right into my eyes. And then I realized... you couldn't see me. You were looking right through me. I smiled sadly as I leaned forward and softly brushed my lips against yours. Closing my eyes, imagining that you could feel me, that I could feel you.

I've begged the man upstairs, you know the man that doesn't listen to your silent prayers? You know who I'm talking about, my love. I've begged him to let me touch you... just once. But... as usual his answering machine's on. Guess you have to be on the right side of the invisible border to be heard.

I've always thought that the day I would leave you, the day I would take my last breath, that I would end up down there. But here I am. Somewhere in between. Waiting for my pardon. Spending as much time with you as I can until I'm called upon. I'm almost dreading the day they tell me I'm cleared for boarding, cleared to take one small step after another up those white stairs I can see through the clouds when I look up at the sky.

So beautiful, so pure.

The morning sun has arrived and you finally close your beautiful green eyes. You've told me so many times what your eye color is. And my god they're magnificent. No need for shining eyes where I am, they vanished with the last beat of my heart. But my love for you still remains.

You look so peaceful. I reach out a hand and stroke your cheek, watching my fingers as they disappear into your living soul. I lower my head and close my eyes. I'm afraid if I open them again, you'll be gone. That I won't be here. It will happen one day, my love. One day I will be gone... forever.

Only in my dreams will I be able to see you.

I love you, Jack.
Wherever you are.
And wherever I will be.

The End!


Lyric Wheel fic after these lyrics:

Winnie The Pooh "Wherever You Are"

Come out moon
Come out wishing star
Come out, come out
Wherever you are

I'm out here in the dark
All alone and wide awake
Come and find me
I'm empty and I'm cold
And my heart's about to break
Come and find me
I need you to come here and find me
'Cos without you I'm totally lost
I've hung a wish on every star
It hasn't done much good so far
I can only dream of you
Wherever you are

I'll hear you laugh
I'll see you smile
I'll be with you
Just for a while

But when the morning comes
And the sun begins to rise
I will lose you
Because it's just a dream
When I open up my eyes
I will lose you
I used to believe in forever
But forever's too good to be true
I've hung a wish on every star
It hasn't done much good so far
I don't know what else to do
Except to try to dream of you
And wonder if you are dreaming too
Wherever you are

Wherever you are